What are you saying?I want to try.He wanted clarification on that. You want to try what?There it was, that deep flush. You know.Yes, he knew, but he wasn’t going to let her off the hook so easily. She was going to be his. For a brief time, she would belong to him and he would have everything he wanted and he wanted her to start talking dirty. Yes. He wanted to teach her, to train her to accept pleasure so she would expect it. No, I don’t know. You’ll have to be plain.Avery blushed a little. I want to be intimate with you.So sweet. So polite. So not happening. That sounds like you want me to get into my pajamas and exchange secrets with you. I’m not your girlfriend, Avery. Tell me what you want. That’s lesson number one. Communication and honesty are the keys to the relationship I want. I need to hear you say plainly what you want.She hesitated, but only for a moment. He wasn’t surprised. Deep her to start talking dirty. Yes. He wanted to teach her, to train her to accept pleasure so she would expect it. No, I don’t know. You’ll have to be plain.Avery blushed a little. I want to be intimate with you.So sweet. So polite. So not happening. That sounds like you want me to get into my pajamas and exchange secrets with you. I’m not your girlfriend, Avery. Tell me what you want. That’s lesson number one. Communication and honesty are the keys to the relationship I want. I need to hear you say plainly what you want.She hesitated, but only for a moment. He wasn’t surprised. Deep in her heart, she was a brave girl. She’d faced so much and still was open with her heart. Damn, but he didn’t understand that. I would like for us to sleep together.I’m not very sleepy. He wasn’t going to let her get away with anything.She groaned a little in obvious frustration. You know that’s not what I’m talking about.Yes. I do. So say what you want.I want to have sex.So clinical. I’ll have to think about that.I want to make love.Sweet, but not what I’m looking for.Her face crinkled into the cutest pout. Damn it, Lee. I want to fuck.Just like that he was primed and ready. She’d said fuck with such a sweet little heat, her eyebrows forming a V over her face as though the entire incident had offended her polite sensibilities. She would learn there wasn’t room for politeness between them.He growled just a little. I want to fuck, too, baby. I want to fuck all night long.
Lexi Blake
As I discussed in the previous chapter, attachment researchers have shown that our earliest caregivers don't only feed us, dress us and comfort us when we are upset; they shape the way our rapidly growing brain perceives reality. Our interactions with our caregivers convey what is safe and what is dangerous: whom we can count on and who will let us down; what we need to do to get our needs met. This information is embodied in the warp and woof of our brain circuitry and forms the template of how we think of ourselves and the world around us. These inner maps are remarkably stable across time.This doesn‘t mean, however, that our maps can‘t be modified by experience. A deep love relationship, particularly during adolescence, when the brain once again goes through a period of exponential change, truly can transform us. So can the birth of a child, as our babies often teach us how to love. Adults who were abused or neglected as children can still learn the beauty of intimacy and mutual trust or have a deep spiritual experience that opens them to a larger universe. In contrast, previously uncontaminated childhood maps can become so distorted by an adult rape or assault that all roads are rerouted into terror or despair. These responses are not reasonable and therefore cannot be changed simply by reframing irrational beliefs.
Bessel A. van der Kolk
HlI watch Ethan try to connect the dots in his head, And suddenly his face falls into a sad smile.Oh, he says. And that's all.I walk over to him, my bare feet sinking into the sand as I trudge along. He's grinning at me now, but it's not the usual plastered-on smile he usually has. This one is somehow more authentic.When I am within a few feet of him, he holds his arms out.You're going to be such a good leader, he says. I am so proud of you, Five.I embrace Ethan. His arms fold around me as he pats me on the back. He lets out a long, slow sigh and then starts to say something. I cut him off before he can get the words out. I can't stand to hear him say another thing.Ethan, I am really sorry about this. But it's for the best.I can feel his body clench as the blade slips out of my forearm sheath and into his back. It slides between his ribs-a lucky shot- then retracts back into my hoodie sleeve. It's over in an instant. I step away from him. He stands frozen, probably in shock. There's a deep spot of read blooming across the right side of his chest where the blade must have broken the skin. Blood drops down from the hidden wrist sheath, running over my right hand before falling from my fingertips to the sand.It's over, I murmur, more to myself than to Ethan. He's probably not paying much attention to what I have to say. Tears are welling in his good eye, but I don't know if they're for me or for himself. He blinks once and then falls to the beach with a soft thud.
Pittacus Lore